Be Intentional: Building Relationships That Last

When I was nearing the end of Bible school, right in the middle of my senior internship, my Pastor arranged for me to sit next to a young couple in the new members orientation class. I was a plant. I was there by design. It was intentional.

At the time, it felt a little sly—almost underhanded. In hindsight, though, I see it for what it was: not deceptive, but strategic. My Pastor knew what he was doing. On one hand, he had new people in the church who needed connection. On the other, he had an intern who needed to learn about leadership and discipleship in real time. So, he orchestrated a meeting that could serve both purposes.

That day taught me something about intentionality in ministry: real connections don’t happen by accident. They happen because someone makes the choice to be purposeful.

The Power of Intentional Connection

My Pastor and I had been talking throughout my internship about small groups. I had visited the one he led in his home, and the time had come for me to try leading one myself. Small groups can begin in many ways—by splitting a large group, by launching around a theme, or, in this case, by strategically fostering new relationships.

I started a conversation with the couple and discovered the young man loved mountain biking. He had even participated in an organized ride across the state of Georgia. That was my “in.” While I wasn’t a passionate cyclist, I was genuinely interested enough to let him take the lead in teaching me. Before long, I bought a bike—an $1,100 investment—and began training with him. I knew that commitment would mean hours spent together, and more importantly, a growing friendship.

That bike became more than a piece of equipment; it became a tool of intentional ministry. The relationships that started then have lasted thirty years. And I can tell you that the trajectories of lives were changed because I bought a mountain bike. That small group grew to include more people. Marriages happened. Children were born. And the glory belongs to God for it all. 

Intentionality in Scripture

The Bible gives us countless examples of people who lived with purpose and built relationships through intentional effort:

• Jesus with His Disciples Jesus didn’t just hope people would follow Him; He called them by name: “Come, follow me” (Matthew 4:19). He invested His time, His meals, His teaching, and His life into them. His intentional relationships became the foundation of the church.

  
  

• Paul with Timothy Paul chose Timothy, mentored him, and entrusted him with leadership (Acts 16:1–3; 2 Timothy 2:2). This wasn’t casual—it was deliberate discipleship with the goal of multiplying leaders.

  
  

• Barnabas with Paul When the early church was afraid of Paul’s past, it was Barnabas who intentionally stood beside him, vouched for him, and opened doors (Acts 9:26–27). That single act changed the trajectory of Paul’s ministry.

  
  

• Nehemiah’s Strategy Nehemiah didn’t simply wish for Jerusalem’s wall to be rebuilt. He prayed, planned, and positioned people intentionally to accomplish the work (Nehemiah 2:17–18; 4:13–14). Purposeful strategy turned vision into reality.

Living Intentionally Today

Intentionality is not manipulation; it’s stewardship. It’s choosing to invest time, attention, and even resources into people because relationships matter. Scripture calls us to this kind of purposeful living:

• “Let all that you do be done with love.” — 1 Corinthians 16:14

  
  

• “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together…” — Hebrews 10:24–25

  
  

• “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.” — Proverbs 21:5

  
  

• “Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.” — Colossians 4:5

Being intentional means thinking strategically about how we spend our time, how we build connections, and how we use our resources to glorify God.

Conclusion

That mountain bike cost me more than a thousand dollars, but it bought me something far more valuable: time, trust, and friendships that have lasted decades. Ministry—and biblical living—is not accidental. It requires thought, purpose, and love in action.

Be intentional. Relationships grow when we choose to plant and cultivate them.

Love in Christ,

Jason Davidson